Just the way you are

Today was..nice.

A friend and i landed up Casa Del Sol for  some food and chit chat. I was so tempted to have something with alcohol, but I respect her too much to drink in front of her. Well I should be calling her Akka, but.. Ill call her Akka! she and I had this long chat about marriage, trust and commitment while somebody was crooning Just the way you are by Billy Joel. It was a heart to heart talk between an older married woman and a young singleton scared about marriage. Well actually she gave me more reasons to not get married, but she also put so many things in perspective. Some things I knew, but affirmation helped me sound less cynical to myself.

I mean who does’nt want a knight in shining armor. But they are mythical and non-existent. A marriage doesn’t solve any personal problems – loneliness and what ever issues you might have with your family. But it shouldn’t just be a distraction and an escape.

So what is the use of marriage?

I think marriage is to find a witness in your life. Like the murder witnesses (sorry to sound morbid! It might be the white wine *laughs*) everyone just stays a distant witness to each others lives, not involving/meddling in the others matters. I am not saying that there aren’t couples who truly love each other and still do things together, but that is rare. Love goes out of the window once your life doesn’t meet the expectations you had.

And what is love? It’s such a temporary thing. Especially for a man (I am sorry but that is true). It’s just a bunch of a feelings and emotions – a high of sort..like a nice PMS!

If I have my way I never *ever* wanna fall in love again. I have had my heart broken too many times. Yennike idhe thevaiya?

So do I resign to an arranged marriage? Or do I carry on thinking I *might* find someone? even if I did find someone, what are the chances that he’ll look after me. And why should he? I have a job.

Since it is established I will be looking after myself, irrespective of an arranged or love marriage, I have come back to the square A – why should I get married?

*sigh* Note to self: Go figure.


~ by tia on May 23, 2008.

5 Responses to “Just the way you are”

  1. hey .. its the same friend u told me about.. and sorry to not make in to the play wid u … was really busy… i hate my life!

  2. *Varun
    Yeah..its the same one…Hmm…when did u start reading my blog??

  3. 🙂 that was nice…being the witness part..

    but i dont agree with the part that love goes out of the window for a man…with the correct person, it shifts its personality like all emotions…it ceases to be all consuming, heart racing , bright eyed thing to a comfortable enjoyable relaxing emotion…which is pretty gud…we may not buy roses and dine her out everyday but our life does revolve around her…

    wht iam saying pal is that it does exist and its more common thn u think…so dont give up

  4. @tia

    i started bloggin again.. so was checking the previous links.

  5. *tys
    so how do you explain an extra-marital affair?

    Hmm guessed as much…

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