If it flies away…

You know what’s wrong with you, Miss Whoever-you-are? You’re chicken, you’ve got no guts. You’re afraid to stick out your chin and say, “Okay, life’s a fact, people do fall in love, people do belong to each other, because that’s the only chance anybody’s got for real happiness.” You call yourself a free spirit, a “wild thing,” and you’re terrified somebody’s gonna stick you in a cage. Well baby, you’re already in that cage. You built it yourself. And it’s not bounded in the west by Tulip, Texas, or in the east by Somali-land. It’s wherever you go. Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself.

– Paul Varjak, Breakfast at Tiffanys 

Jo loves telling me a certain Khalil Gibran story. He’s been saying it bast 4 years! 🙂

It’s a story or a quote: when you have a bird, don’t keep it in a cage. Let it fly. If it flies away, it was never meant to be yours. If it stays it is yours to keep.

And most relationships are like that, no matter what the degree of intimacy: acquaintance, friend, lover or husband/wife. If you can let go and it stays, it’s yours to keep. And no matter what it will stay. Don’t cage the person.

Funnily, we are in different cages our selves. When we are in a relationship, we are in one cage, dying to be single. When we are single, we are in a cage we have made for ourselves, and trying to get into a cage made by someone else – a relationship.

All this cage talk reminds me of this dialogue from Breakfast at Tiffany’s (my favorite movie):

Paul Varjak: I love you.
Holly Golightly: So what.
Paul Varjak: So what? So plenty! I love you, you belong to me!
Holly Golightly: [tearfully] No. People don’t belong to people.
Paul Varjak: Of course they do!
Holly Golightly: I’ll never let ANYBODY put me in a cage.
Paul Varjak: I don’t want to put you in a cage, I want to love you!


~ by tia on March 14, 2008.

4 Responses to “If it flies away…”

  1. is that your favorite movie?

  2. *burf

  3. 🙂 …love with conditions, expectations , duties, roles etc will always be prisoning…but like they say, u always ‘fall’ in love…love for its own sake is uplifting…but such a love cannot be restricted to only one…it become engulfing…

    but we seek the imprisonment, becoz it helps us move from me to us…jeez…iam putting myself to sleep.

  4. *Tys

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